Showing posts with label Mistress DJ Blog. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Mistress DJ Blog. Show all posts

How to have a session with a Domme (for first timers)

This can apply for in person sessions or first encounters with a Dominatrix for an online or virtual/telephone session.

I really love intro sessions! It’s an honor to introduce a new submissive to the world of kink. Personally it’s very gratifying to feed off the intensity of an experience that for so many is the culmination of years of longing and fantasy.

Of course those contemplating a first contact, call or session are always anxious, excited and curious about what to expect. Generally my answer to “What can I expect from a session?” is “A BDSM/kink experience at a light to medium level that incorporates your known interests and respects your limits”.

I’m quite sure I’ve disappointed a few newbies with that answer but it’s important to note that very few professional Mistresses will provide a blow by blow description of what will happen in a session. Why is this?

* Functionality. Real play is just that. Real. It’s not edited like the many fetish videos you may have seen. That super hot thing you’ve been dying to try? It may not work for you in real life. During a scene your Domme will be paying close attention to your body language, gauging what is working and what is not. Sometimes the difference between a successful session and a not so great one is the ability to move on from something that’s not working and try something else. The obligation to deliver on a promised script tends to preclude this.

*Timewasters. Unfortunately not everyone who contacts professional Mistresses is sincere. For these people pre-session communication is an erotic experience in itself. They often seek detailed descriptions of proposed session content as a source of free, personalised erotic fiction. (in other words, free wank material.) This tends to make us wary of questions that amount to “What are you going to do to me?”.

* No spoilers! Quality Mistresses will take care to incorporate your specific areas of interest into the play. Part of what makes a session fun and exciting is experiencing just how your Mistress will use her skill and creativity to bring your interests to life. Of course we want you to enjoy your session time. It makes the session time fun for us as well and obviously makes good business sense.

Need to know more? Many quality professional ladies include reviews and testimonials as part of their online presence as well as talking about their sessions on their blogs and social media properties. Perusing these is an excellent way to get a feel for what a session will be like.

Quality consent is informed consent. I encourage new players to research widely so they have information about their kinks (including the risks involved) from various sources.

On Nerves:

Even experienced submissives are always nervous before a session.  A first session can feel like a big step. It’s ok to be nervous but as adults it’s my expectation that the people I play with take responsibility for their own emotions. If you’re nervous to the point where you feel you can’t be reliable or you expect the lady you’ve contacted to cajole you in the door you’re probably not ready to make a booking.