Showing posts with label BDSM. Show all posts
Showing posts with label BDSM. Show all posts

The Submission of Tony - a short FemDom Tale

 




Tony nervously drove to DJ's dungeon, heart pounding in his ears. He had heard many things about DJ's skill as a domme and he was excited but nervous at the same time.  When he arrived he was met by the delightful sight of her, tall and blonde with a fiery gaze and an inviting smirk. She welcomed Tony with a 15 minute session where they went over protocols and safeword usage.


She walked him through the dungeon, casually describing the equipment and how it could be used. Tony was full of anticipation as she explained the effects of each session. He kept thinking about how powerful DJ must be and how lucky he was to be here. 


The session began with foot worship. Tony was made to kneel before DJ and gently massage her feet. He felt incredibly vulnerable as he worshiped her feet, and it was an experience he would never forget. Tony bowed his head before Mistress DJ in reverence as he approached her feet. His eyes followed the curves of her toes and calves with admiration. His heart raced with anticipation as he inhaled her foot odor through his nose. Tony slowly descended to his knees and brought his face close to DJ's feet, letting out a deep sigh of pleasure. He ran his fingertips along the surface of her soft skin, taking in the feel of her delicate feet. He kissed her toes, pressing his lips against her skin and savoring the taste of her feet. He moved his hands up and down the length of her legs, rubbing and massaging her feet with gentle, loving strokes. He applied enough pressure to get the perfect balance of pleasure and relaxation. His hands worked their way across her feet, kneading them and exploring their curves. Finally, Tony let out a satisfied moan and pressed his face between her toes. He breathed in deeply, savoring the combination of her foot musk and the scent of the lotion she had applied beforehand. He then licked her feet all over, savoring the unique tang of her sweat mixed with the sweetness of the lotion. The experience was exhilarating. Even after Tony had finished, he still wanted more and stayed next to DJ's feet, worshiping her and savoring her divine presence. After his worshipful attendance, DJ then moved on to flogging. 


Tony was bound to a post as DJ prepared to flog him: Tony trembled with anticipation as Mistress DJ approached him. He had dreamt of this for as long as he could remember, and now that it was finally here he felt his heart racing in his chest. DJ was tall and imposing, wearing a black leather bodysuit and knee-high boots. Her eyes were full of intensity as she looked Tony up and down, taking in every inch of him. She smiled slyly and then pulled out a flogger from the rack. Tony gulped as Mistress DJ moved closer to him. He felt his body tense up in anticipation as DJ used the flogger to lightly strike his nude body. With each impact, an electric sensation shot through his body and his heart raced faster. Mistress DJ took her time, exploring every inch of her submissive's body with the flogger. She teased his skin with light strokes, inflicting small pulses of pain that sent waves of pleasure throughout his body. His breathing became ragged as she increased the intensity of the flogging, leaving him quivering and writhing in delight. Finally, Tony could take no more and let out a shuddering sigh of pleasure. Mistress DJ smiled in satisfaction, knowing that her submissive had been completely taken by her. With one final flourish, Mistress DJ unfastened the ropes that bound Tony to the pole. She brushed her lips against his cheek and whispered in his ear, "That was beautiful."

The lashes stung, but he found that the endorphins released from the pain actually made it pleasurable. When DJ stopped, Tony felt exhilarated and a bit addicted. 


DJ then moved on to cock and ball torture. She had a variety of tools for this, and Tony knew that the sensations would be intense. First, she put clothespins on his nipples. Then, she started teasing his balls with a feather tickler, which made him gasp with pleasure. 

Starting softly and then increasing intensity until his entire body was shaking with pleasure.


Next, Mistress DJ stepped it up a notch, replacing the feather with a bamboo cane. This time, the pain was more intense and immediate, causing Tony to cry out in agony. Mistress DJ seemed to take pleasure in his pain though, as she kept going, inch by inch, increasing the pressure until Tony was sure that his head would burst.


Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, Mistress DJ stopped, allowing Tony to catch his breath. But, instead of letting him go, she grabbed a blindfold and tied it tightly over his eyes. Tony felt completely in Mistress DJ's control now, and he reveled in the sensation. 


The next thing he knew, Mistress DJ was back to her feather and cane torture, alternating between tender caresses and vicious blows. Tony was soon lost in a euphoric haze as his body responded to each sensation in turn. By the end of it, Tony felt as if he had been through an emotional and physical roller coaster, and all he wanted was to stay in Mistress DJ's dungeon forever.


Finally, DJ brought out the vibrating Hitachi wand. She moved it slowly over Tony's cock and balls, making sure to hit all of his nerve endings. The sensations were almost too much to bear, but Tony loved every second of it. 


When the session was finished, Tony felt like he had been to another world. His body was full of pleasure and pain in equal measure, and he couldn't believe how amazing the experience had been. He thanked DJ for the experience, and left with a feeling of accomplishment - he had done something he had never thought possible before. 


Tony was sure that he would be back for more - DJ had opened up a new world of experiences for him, and he was eager to explore further. He had fetishes he’d like to discuss…



Read tales similar (and even spicier from my newest release)




How is it possibly April already?

Ok, well. I'm uncertain how it became April already, wasn't it just last week we were saying Happy New Year?!


Apparently not.


So, lent...who is participating? Did you give up bad habit? *eyes a few of you* Did you decide to pick up new good habits? *eyes even more of you*

I think you know I like to bring some education here to my little corner of the world, so today I'd like you to learn about yourself. 

https://bdsmtest.org/select-mode

Please disregard the "deviant" comment on their landing page, I find that incredibly disrespectful.  The goal here is to find out where you are on the kinkster scale. Are you more Dominant than you thought? Do you have fetishes you were unaware of? 

Feel free to share the results with me, or don't...your choice, this isn't an assignment, but rather a learn more about yourself endeavor.    

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Now for some education:

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Use your senses (today is about the ears/hearing)

I will give you an interesting example of two examples (auditory) that I knew I had as a fetish/turn on and one that is new:

The first one is the sound of leather and it's rustling? crunching? moving? etc. It's not a common sound and I have heard it the few times I needed help from law enforcement and either their belt or boots made the noise (so I found it a comfort) I am unaware of the sound when I wear the leather myself (maybe kind of like why you can't tickle yourself? food for thought) But, when my Alpha is wearing something leather and shifts around it's bliss to my ears. (Eargasm incoming!!! kidding, sort of)


The second is quite simple. The sound of coffee being stirred in a certain pattern and way (but consistently everytime.) Again, a comfort thing as it goes back to childhood. When my dad, a pilot, was home, I'd hear him make coffee in the morning so those sounds meant "he's home." In the mornings, when my Alpha makes coffee, I've noticed the same consistent way of stirring coffee..."he's home."


Now the new one isn't for the faint of heart or if you didn't know I can be "switchy" now might be a good time to secure your seatbelt, put on your safety glasses and hold on! (although, if you know me, you know this) a new sound that is delightful is a belt (buckle particularly) being messed with...the jingle? the clanking? whatever word you want to give it. Simply delightful.

Ok DJ great. Why did you share this? Because whether virtually or in person, USE YOUR SENSES!! Even if you are exploring solo or playing solo...use your senses (more than just visual or touch) smells, sounds, tastes can all be incorporated and I'd encourage you to do so.





What if you did submit?

Many of us live in a repressed world. We don’t feel safe enough to share our truest, deepest desires with each other. We keep certain fantasies strictly to ourselves, hiding them where no one else is allowed to look. These desires are not allowed into the light — they’re our secret shame, our darkness denied. But privately they remain very rich and real to us. What if you could explore some of those fantasies though? I know you can’t, but what if? What if you could connect with a willing partner where there was such a deep and powerful bond of trust, that you could share more of yourself than you thought possible? What if this connection was so intimate, that sharing with another simply felt like circulating a thought within your own mind? No walls. No secrets. What if you could allow this person into the dark places of your imagination, the parts that have been shamed as sinful, dirty, naughty — labels that imply wrongness and immorality just for thinking about these possibilities, let alone acting on them?

meanwhile...on the ignore line....

this time of night...I'm pretty boring...I either am reading or watching something on tv. However since someone decided I needed a portion of their stimmy check I'm down to be amusing...so... they got to listen to some of my music you wanna hear what I listen to sometimes?? Here's one of my YouTube playlists

Corona / Covid how are you faring?

from people becoming ill to state lock downs...
from having to wear a mask to shortages on staples...
It's a struggle, many of ya'll have suffered from this...
For the month of September I will be offering 50% off goodies IF you mention you saw this on my blog (shoot me a note, and I will give you the discounted price) AND...the holiday line will be the COVID line at a discounted rate through September 30th!

Adult Education



What you want is an Adult Education. Want to learn about a kink? explore a fetish? Roleplay something you never dared? I gotchu! Look 20 years of experience, study and Domming….I'll help you get there...and if I can't? I will help you on your journey to find it!

flrt.me/MistressDJ

www.mistressdj.comCall Button
Call me, let's explore!

Guess who's back?

Yep! Your favorite Domme/buddy/partner in crime is back!

I've been under the weather....but now...buckle up!!!

Thanks to those that sent gifts, tributes and bought goodies in my absence...not working, when used to working daily (and talking to ya'll) I miss it!




JOI BDSM 101

First, I wrote an article on SimplySxy about a year ago:
https://simplysxy.com/articles/2018/07/08/what-to-know-about-joi/

During Jerkoff Instruction (JOI) a Domme (me) will tell and sometimes instruct a man how to masturbate. The instruction will usually tell men how hard or soft to jerk off, how rapid his strokes should be, and where and how firmly he should touch. 
There are two JOI: jerkoff encouragement (JOE) which is positive reinforcement helping a male to orgasm (think Pavlovian mentality with "good boys" included.), and jerkoff humiliation,  making the man feel dirty or ashamed of his arousal and desire to masturbate.
I do have a specific line for it here:

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Or you can request a custom (that will guide YOU specifically how to masturbate!)

an ode to a Dom/Domme

Ok, ode might be a bit of a stretch.

To those that dare take control of one whom no one knows what to do with...

To those that dare set boundaries and standards for those that typically answer to no one...

To those that educate themselves, not just in BDSM, but on the submissive themself....

To those that give reprieve in power exchange, only if for a few moments....

What You do is important. What You do matters, if to no one else? to the one who is submitting to You.

What You give, when you deliver this control over the sub or switch is relief. Relief of making decisions, relief of responsibility, relief of being in charge and even often sexual relief. Just like in typical D/s typically the sub is a strong person who is looking for this relief. To Top a switch is no different.

I personally have Dommed typical subs as well as switches and subbed as well.

I am from the school of thought that good Doms/Dommes have experienced the other end of the whip as it were (whether literal or in the receiving end of mind-fuckery.) This is simply because then when it's their turn to top, they know exactly what it feels like to experience what it is they are about to deliver.

So, to those Domming - my peers, those looking into D/s  Being the Dom/Domme is so much more than whips and chains, so much more than sexual fulfillment or mental fuckery. You are bringing people peace of mind and the deepest of calm.

What we do matters. It isn't flippant, nor is it a game.

I challenge anyone reading this who Doms...to take them higher...






Communication is Key

So...what's your pleasure?


Please put what you or others consider "normal" from your mind! There are always going to be kink shamers that try to say these things are okay and these kinds aren’t. All this focus on what counts as normal, right, proper sex (and what isn't "okay") takes us from the route of what we might like to explore or what tweaks our tweak.
So the first step is to try to ignore all the things you’ve learned or believed/heard about ‘normal sex’ and all the things you've "heard" is "amazing sex" and focus on what YOU would actually like to do. That might include kink or at least kink as foreplay. 
People are into all different kinds of things. For example you might enjoy TPE/controlling another and never go near being submissive or impact play. Or vice versa. . Nobody should ever tell you that your motivations or preferences are any less valid that anyone else’s. One day you may find you want to be in charge and the next day on your knees.
Communicate it!

If you’re not sure what you’re into you can check out  kinky videos, erotic fiction, or various BDSM websites and see what gets your attention. Another idea is a yes, no, maybe list - of if things sound interesting. If you can't find a good one, I have one I will gladly send you to help you explore!
Preferences and desires often change over time, and with experience. You should re-examine your ideas/kinks from time to time. Some people write, and update, a kind of ‘user manual’ for themselves to give partners a longer explanation of how they – and their body – work. One particularly important thing to get across is any ‘hard limits’ (things that go beyond no interest but are a "hell no") and ‘triggers’ (things that will upset/cause a reaction in you) you’re aware of so that partners know what they really shouldn't do or say.
Safewords are a good idea - traditional BDSM uses Red, Yellow and Green...during a check in green, like a stoplight is "all good." Yellow meaning this is on the edge of limitations and Red is a "safeword" or "STOP"
However, with your partner you can come up with your own terminology where if something is new or if something is...as with the One I answer to a "no no" (meaning it isn't going to happen under any circumstances - a beyond negotiable hard limit) 
The absolutely key thing with all of this is to create conditions under which whatever you do is most likely to be consensual for all concerned. Speak up! "I'd like to try this..." Or "I'd like it if you did this to me." If the session is virtual (most of our worlds are at a minimum partially virtual.) "I'd like to feel this way." "It would be great if you could do this for me." (Examples might be guided masturbation, setting up a schedule for a sub, or even a session of no holds-barred kinky talk.)
Main thing is communicate! Whether with a vanilla partner or with your Dom/me or sub, no one reads minds. Convey what you're thinking and what you'd like (you'll be surprised!) If they are your partner, they are going to want you pleased/to feel good (yes even Dom/mes like when they deliver pleasure.)
Hope that helps! Now go communicate!



5 Ways to Recognize Topping from the Bottom






Topping from the bottom is a misunderstood term in BDSM, especially if you are a novice. The idea behind the term is to help submissives understand their role, and isn't more than a faux pas. During interactions with your Dominant, it's a lesson to know that you can't control what is going on. Topping from the bottom is when you simultaneously adopt both roles. Examples of this could be in the form of giving commands, refusing requests or moving to control the location of impacts during play. Generally, it is frowned upon to try to force the Dominant's hand to do something they do not wish to do.

1. You contradict the decision of your dominant.

If you try to change his or her mind about the decision they have made, without a valid reason, you are topping from the bottom. Examples could range from trying to convince them to use a different toy because you don't like the one they are using, to asking them if they are sure they want to eat at Joe's Restaurant when you really want to eat at Donna's Cafe.

2. You ignore the request or command.

This one goes without saying, but pretending you didn't hear the request and just to carry on doing what you want to do is not appropriate. Acknowledge the request as soon as possible and follow out the command as best you can. You can always go back to what you were doing afterward. The dominant is expecting your service at all times, not just when you want to give it. Topping from the bottom can be non-verbal.

3. You ask "What is in it for me if I do x y z?"

Submission isn't about pleasing you directly. Being directed to do something from your Dominant is to please them, and as my Master always says, "Doing things for me should be your pleasure." Conditional submission is topping from the bottom and should not exist, you either submit or you don't. What you get in return is up to your Dominant. Negotiating this at the beginning of the relationship is critical.

4. You pull away from physical contact.

This is a tough one, but typically in a D/s relationship, you have given over control of your body to your Dominant. This means that if they wish to touch you, that is their right. Telling them with physical withdrawal that you do not wish to be touched is trying to force their decision to touch you. Removing yourself from the situation is topping from the bottom. Learn to accept the attention, no matter what it is; it could develop into a wonderfully intimate time between the two of you.

5. You say "no".*

As a submissive, you may hang on to the right to say no, but if the Dominant gives you a reasonable request and it is within your negotiated terms to do, then you shouldn't say no. Inconveniencing you isn't a valid excuse. Neither is I don't want to. Your Dominant has your better interests at heart, but also their desires. Perform the task and then feel good about it. What you just did may have enhanced your relationship, or you just refreshed their coffee. Either way, life is good.
* No is an important word in a D/s relationship, but one that shouldn't be abused. Just like safewords, this word is only to be used in non-negotiated situations or when something needs to be cleared up first. Remember: use sparingly.



let's have a talk about D/s especially focusing on submission.


Three types of submissive


  1. The immediate submissive finds an immediate reward as a "consequence" of the act of submission. This may be something like sexual arousal, the satiation (temporarily, at least) of feelings of guilt, or simply the pleasure of an endorphine rush. The act of submission is not pleasurable or satisfying on its own.
  2. The psychological submissive finds her reward in the act of submission itself. This satisfaction or pleasure can, for example, come from the associated with temporarily giving up responsibility. Or it can come from a relaxation of the need to "be herself" while the dominant is in control; she can, instead, simply be nothing, she can abandon herself completely.
  3. The slave has an internal need or craving that is appeased by the act of submission. The act of submission itself may or may not be pleasurable to the slave, but the release from the pressure of the need always is.

(from: https://www.peter-masters.com/wiki/index.php/Understanding_Submission)
great resource page to newcomers.

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If you're reading this, you likely know me from Niteflirt or found me elsewhere...If you've been around for a while, you've heard how and where I got my start - how I cut my teeth as a Domme and even about the ever-so-mysterious-Phantom...

Well as you know, I lost Phantom / my Master in 2015.

I am a believer that to be a good Domme/Dom one needs to understand it from both sides of the whip as it were. I will continue to say that as it's a genuine belief. Since then, the spark of "what to pass along" or that spark/flame inside that I'd felt (including subspace and all the wonderful feelings of submission) was slowly fading.

"When you aren't looking."

When someone isn't afraid of who I am, instead seems amused at my facets and contradictions.

When someone is willing to take on the mantle / pick up the torch of "Master" or "Dom" (when that wasn't what it was about)

When someone cares about giving me that experience again in my life versus their own needs.

That person deserves a second look...





This is just the beginning...but with a recharged/refreshed Domme...all the old guard ways...with manners, protocol and respect will not only be educated and reminded, but enforced. Who is He? You needn't worry about that...For now you'll see me mind my capital letters and refer to him as "Mr. O" or "Mr. Oisín" You likely don't know Him, but you will quickly see what He brings to my life as I pass along the trembles and feels of subspace as well as the relief of power exchange.

Descending the stairs




Descending the stairs, the dim light from the sconces only provides highlight to Her form.
Fearing to speak freely, you utter, "Mistress?" seeking Her out.
Perched on Her throne in the corner She observes you, like a cat stalking a bird on the grass.
Taking a sip from Her coffee, She slurps causing your strained gaze to shift Her direction.


Descending the stairs, you can now make out the steam rising from Her mug on the table.
Examining the crimson cinder block walls--the word dungeon clangs in your head like a bell.
Watching, still perched, your Domme awaits your submission.
Impatiently, Her boot heel scuffs the floor, causing you to jump a bit.


Descending the stairs, your new life is ahead--one of submission.
Trembling with anticipation you strip, kneeling as directed.
Standing gracefully, your Goddess slowly approaches, Her heels clicking on the concrete floor.
You look up once and meet Her grey gaze then immediately cast your eyes downward.

Now your new life begins....

Are you really a submissive / potential pet or slave or is it just masturbation fodder?

Are you really capable of putting My needs before every single one of your own?

To think about how a situation will affect Me before how it affects you? "Will this be pleasing to DJ?" – That is what true submission looks like.

You have to want to do anything and everything, under any circumstance, wherever, whenever it is asked or demanded of you, to please Me. I must always come first. Whatever I ask of you, you must do without question, (of course contractual agreements and limits would be respected) but...could you do that?

If, despite and in spite of all the above, you still feel that it’s for you? You must always approach and interact with respect. Manners are very important – they show intelligence and sincerity as well. Stating your truth and what you're really seeking is key, answer questions from Me honestly --so we can better build our D/s bond Be yourself. Above all, be HONEST. If you lie, you’ll defeat the object of this endeavor.

Many guys twist the BDSM world for masturbation fodder, and I suppose that's ok -- but, you need to realize that fantasizing about serving Me (to get off essentially) and really putting in the work of a pet are two different things.

The Elfin Files -- A night in the life of a Domme

For starters, I'm not here to out anyone. As a Dominatrix with a couple of decades under my leather, some nights...we're called to step up. I had two different individuals contact me. One, I could tell he was having a hard time, but then he vocalized it "I'm struggling." It was a short call on Niteflirt, and a message that let me know he wasn't doing as well as he could. I tasked him with an assignment, a maintenance spanking with a full report back to me when complete. This seemed to soothe the sub-fever...no pics as his report was in a video...but long story short... he's going through changes in his life, new found freedom, if you will...and is now alone at holiday season time...so if nothing else I occupied his mind and time for a bit...


The second one made an attempt to reach out to me on social media, alebeit an awkward one...but, little did "she" know I had a plan...

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First: an elf plug.



Next: the superhero elfin outfit



Finally: a "male human disguise" over her elfin self...this time of year humans would just bug our elfin friends anyhow...

Bratting - why it isn't always cute

I am going to step out on a thin branch right here and say something point blank: Bratting isn't cute, and I am beginning to associate it with time wasters. Bratting can easily cross the line from being "fun" to "poke at the Domme" to where the sub is just badly behaved. There is nothing worse than someone who wastes my time! These will be people that send little hellos here and there, or promise that they will be in contact soon only to bonk off again...Ones that say....oh I'll call later tonight and try to get me to chat a scene (which is possible) but it requires INTERACTION....and of course...there's always the freebie seekers...but I digress.. The worst ones, however, are the ones that W/we are forming a BDSM relationship -- something doesn't align with their petty selfish ways and they either "ghost" altogether or try to regain some margin of control with their behavior...this can be trying to buy their way out (many gifts, hefty tributes and gift cards) or by trying to put on a good behavior "show" (leaving feedback everywhere, re-tweeting everything, etc) While I'm not one to turn down either...they don't make up for poor behavior.

As a sub, you are not in control of the scene, the situation or the relationship.

Read that again.

Your hard limits will be respected. Your lines will be pushed and I'll take you for the ride of your life;

BUT

"Bratting" to get my attention

"Bratting" because things aren't developing as YOU want them

"Bratting" to delay/change something

is atrocious.

It wastes MY time and yours.

Also....when I've given people multiple chances, and even pulled them back into the fold a few times and they continue to play games...I let them go. I deal with a few subs, as you can imagine, I simply cannot afford (timewise) one that is attempting to garnish all of my time with their poor behavior



Here is a good article for you sassy-fucks out there:

http://dominantguide.com/1525/the-brat-ownership-guide/

It does clarify the line of bratting vs being a badly behaved sub.

Clothespins and BDSM

Clothespins can be a wonderful addition to BDSM play and are relatively easy to learn how to use. Many new comers to BDSM start with things like clothespins. Clothespins are usually used to give the sensation of pain to certain body parts. They can create many sensations and even increase the intensity of orgasm. With some caution and imagination clothespins can be used in any number of deviously enjoyable ways.

Most frequently, clothespins are used on the tits, especially on nipples. Clothespins can be placed on the nipples in many positions. You can start from clothespins pointing straight onto the nipple, not from the side, gripping the base of the nipple, not the tip. This does not have the same sort of ‘bite’ as grasping the nipple alone may, and often does wonderful things for sensitivity without causing pain. Pointing straight out is an especially deviant way to clothespin your partner.
You can clamp the nipple only, or work gradually out from the areola as your partner’s ability to enjoy more increases. The soft flesh under the nipple is a great place to experiment. You can also clothespin on sideways, with the nipple centered in the the hole in the clamping area. If you do this far enough back on the nipple base or areola, the tip of a large nipple will remain exposed for other things, such as ice, nibbling, or smaller clips and clamps.

The nipple is the classical place to begin practice of clothespin play.. But many areas of the body might do well with a bit of clamping either for sensation or visual appeal. There are other parts to decorate your body with clothespins such as inner thighs, the webbing between toes and fingers, scrotum, along the shaft of a penis, labias, clitoris, behind the knees and inside the elbows, and even the tonge. Generally, the clothespins can be used on any part of the body where you can ‘pinch’ up a fold of skin for the clothespins to grab.

A chain that runs through a pair or set of clothespins will add to the enjoyment. As your partner moves, the chain will cause the part of the body the clothespin is attached to move as well, creating a wonderful sensation of weight and pain. You can create a row, circle on the belly or back, a belt of clothespins round the waist, a circle round the thighs as a reminder to keep them spread, etc.

Don’t allow any clamping device to remain in place longer than 20 minutes maximum! The clothespins create the erotic sensations by cutting off the blood circulation. The whole idea of clamping is creating condensed erotic pain when the blood flow starts recirculating back into the unclamped tissues. When left in place too long, or placed where they can crush or damage tissue and internal structures, such as the delicate blood vessels of the penile shaft or the hood of the clitoris, watch out! Never clamp any piece of flesh near to dense blood vessels, to avoid damaging nerves, or internal structures, such as the corpus cavernosum and corpus spongiosum of the penis, and tissues of the clitoral hood in women. Any damage to these structures can be permanent and cause lifelong pain and suffering.
Stay safe and sane by removing the clothespins until you are more familiar with how your partner’s body responds to them.


Pulling off a clothespin is more painful than squeezing the legs to remove it gently. Taking the closthepins off causes a stronger rush of pain than putting them on. That’s because the blood is rushing back to that area of the body. If your partner is anxious, instruct him or her to take a deep breath and gently squeeze the legs of the wooden closthespin until it comes off.

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